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Unexpected Events

I'm a note taker.  I like writing down random thoughts in random places, but I always take notes during Church, so I love keeping a small notebook in my Bible.   I believe it makes me a more active listener, plus I always jot down if I've brought a guest that Sunday, or how many souls were saved, and always include the Word that we read.
      This gem came from none other than Hobby Lobby, where Jason and I hit up some Christmas steals for next year.  I knew when I saw it that it was coming home with me and replacing my old worn out mini notebook. I wanted to start fresh with a New Year and a new book.  I plan to keep all of them, I often find myself looking back through and re-reading a Word that was delivered months ago.  I also write the date and who is bringing the Message, be it an Evangelist, our own Pastor, or a Brother who steps up in the church and delivers when our Pastor is out of town, etc.  My notes are so precious to me, and I hope someday to pass them down to Caiden, and let him have those to look back on.  Someday 2014 is going to seem like it was a million years ago.

      So I started the beginning of my book with some goals that I would like to see myself accomplish, and left the next couple pages blank, because God is always laying new things on my heart.  Not everything is church related, but most of my goals are.  I love my Bible studies, that is my new addiction.  I've had so many people tell me that they love Beth Moore.  A little piece of advice, head over to Amazon where Beth has FOURTEEN of her studies free in E-Book format.  It definitely blessed me, and I can't imagine the millions of others that she is blessing with this offer.  For IPhone users you can download the Kindle app, and the same goes for Android users.  All FOURTEEN books are free right now, so even if you don't think you'll ever read them, its something I would surely take advantage of, because FREE is always good. At least to me anyway. :)
      Jason and I set a goal as a couple to read completely through the Bible this year.  I've read the entire Bible, but never consecutively and never with a plan.  So I hopped on Google and got us a plan for the entire year.  The plan I chose was for the New Living Translation Bible, because it is SO much easier to understand as you read along, at least it has proven to be that way to us.  The plan gives you so many chapters a night, nothing overwhelming or nothing that is terribly time consuming, just a few chapters and you can actually pick how you want to read it.  I chose to read through in chronological order.  So at first, we started with Genesis, of course, and then it led us to Job.  We will finish Job, and then Genesis by the end of the month.

     This is what our Bible study looks like.  I have the Bible App on my Kindle which reads out loud (that's another freebie), that's our plan on the white pages in the middle and to the left you can see Jason following along in his Bible which is the NKJ version.  He likes to read both, and we pause a lot and compare what mine says versus what his says, and so far; its perfect.  It is such a relationship builder, we take time out of every night we can, and then play catch up on other nights.  It has to be my absolute favorite thing to do with him.  He understands parts that I don't and I understand parts that he doesn't, so we're learning, but teaching each other at the same time.  I pray that this is something we do for the rest of our time together. Here is a picture of how my Kindle reads;

very easy terminology, sometimes Caiden even joins.

      I love the story of Job.  I could read it over and over, and I have a gazillion times.  It shows us that God doesn't set us up for failure, he sets us up for His Favor.  I'll be honest, this has been such a rough week.  I've had a ton of blows, and I see so many people on my Facebook, at work, etc. saying the same thing.  The other night I was having the worse day ever, I am a human, I sin.  I don't take the Lord's name in vein, but out of the blue mid-conversation, well, mid-yell to my Mother, I did it.   I had to stop myself right there, and repent.  It wasn't the Lord that was causing me to have a bad day, it was the devil, because just like Job; he can test us.  I failed.  I prayed and prayed for The Lord to forgive me.  That was not my tongue, but I had allowed the devil to control my tongue, temper, and mood for that day.

      Today particularity, I awoke to terrible news, I saw on Facebook where a family had lost all their belongings in an overnight house fire, I saw where an old friend had gotten in to trouble, someone had lost a loved one, and the devil is telling my great-grandmother that she doesn't have control of her mind anymore, all kinds of unexpected events taking place, and I was completely heartbroken.  I have been all day.  It would be so easy to blame God for all these things taking place, but not only was I heartbroken; I became thankful, grateful for a home, my family, my significant other, thankful that as of today I have been sober for 7 years 7 months and 10 days, and thankful that I have had my great-grandmother for 24 years. 

      Thankful that God gave me a choice, a choice to follow him.  Everyone should be SO thankful for that opportunity, many times I fail Him, and yet he still takes me back with arms wide open. So tonight, as I lay down to go to sleep, I think of Job and all that he lost during the storm of his life, the test that God allowed him to go through and how he came out.  Everyone has a chance to "come out" on the good end.  We are given a choice every single day.  I pray for all the messes that the devil has caused, and pray that the lost are found tonight.  For myself, I'm giving thanks, and I can only pray that if tonight is the night that He calls me home, He will be able to say to me "Well done, my good and faithful servant; come and share your Master's happiness!" (Matthew 25:21)

Today, I slept through church.

See? Work.

    I don't miss church. I come Sunday morning although there are many times when I'm sure people wonder if I even took the time to change from my night clothes, (if I'm going to keep it 100% with you sometimes I don't), I literally hop out off bed throw on some jeans grab my Bible and fix my hair on the way to the car. I wouldn't lie to you, it happens, most Sundays. (Give me the benefit of the doubt, I DO work on Saturday night.)
      So Saturday night, was the regular.  Caitlin (you can now read about her in my about me :)), and I worked our full 10 our shift, ended it with a high five (keeping it real), and drove home.  I hopped right in the bed, after hollering "I can't wait until tomorrow morning!"  That's the way I am on Saturday's; I'm SUPER happy for Sunday to come so I can go into the Sanctuary and have a killer service with my church family.
      I can't remember this morning.  At all.  All I know is what they told me, and part of that was I told Jason to "shut up", and my family went to church without me.  This doesn't happen. So, in keeping it real I would like to justify, and plead my case.  When I finally woke up this afternoon, it was 4:30 PM. Past Morning, people.  It was 4:30 PM.
      Rewind to Friday, when I got home from work Friday I was worn out.  I had taken off an hour early so I didn't have to drive my precious nephew through the Winter storm that we were having, although we did end up right in the middle of it, so it was around 9:45 when we FINALLY got home.  I remember telling Jason that I needed a little nap, but to wake me up at 11pm so I could take my medicine.  I take a lot of medicine for tons of hereditary health problems, its not a big deal, something I'm used to and have been used to since I was 17.
      I guess he woke me up and I took my meds, right in my sleepy state.  Sometime in the night, I woke myself up, thought that I hadn't taken it, and took it again.  Saturday morning, I had NO recollection of taking it the night before; so I just took it again, crawled in bed with Caiden and waited for the alarm to go off so I could get up for work. Praise God, I'm typing this.  One of the medicines I take is a blood pressure pill.

More work.

      Waking up Saturday I felt GREAT, I can't explain it, I was walking on sunshine.  Drove to work, had a great day, but around seven I started feeling a little strange.  I never thought anything, at this point we had just figured out that I had triple dosed myself, and my sweet mother was in a panic.  I assured her I was fine, but I felt SO weird.  Side note: Jason had went to Kroger to get me one of those 7 day medicine dispensers at this point, I really think they had thought I lost it. All the way home I felt weird, and when I laid down I felt super weird, like I was outside of my body, I think I may have been high.
      I chose not to say anything to Jason or my mother, because I knew they would panic; and I also know that God is in control.  So I laid in bed and prayed until I fell asleep which happened super fast (I think?).  That is when all of the above happened and I missed the First Service of the New Year.  Typing this, I am much better, my mind is no longer cloudy, and I'm not sleepy at all. I don't feel dizzy or out of my body, or whatever I felt, I feel just fine.  But there you have it, today I slept through church.

Zephaniah 3:17

New Living Translation (NLT)

17 "For the Lord your God is living among you.

    He is a mighty savior.

He will take delight in you with gladness.

    With his love, he will calm all your fears.

    He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.”

This verse was on my daily calendar at work, and in my study Saturday! It was one that I had never heard, or maybe had heard but never received it like I have now.  It blesses my heart SO much to know that the Lord loves us SO much he sings songs!  I can't help but think of my Nani, up there singing along.

When all you can do is laugh.

  The devil gets no glory on this page.  he isn't worthy of having a capital letter when I refer to him, even if it is at the beginning of a sentence, and that is just the way I see it.  It took so much of me to post the link to this blog, knowing that I have had it since before the New Year, and that was one of my resolutions was to fulfill Christs' will in my life in bringing this blog to life.  Which brings me to the pictures,  I posted the link on Facebook just fine, reaching all of my college friends, family, high school friends, co-workers (past and present) and just like that; 150 views.  Hi, y'all. 

      So, obviously I have an Instagram too, it fits better with life than Facebook, because its super easy to snap a quick picture and share it with all of my followers.  The thing about Instagram is, I have more "not in real life" friends, than "in real life friends", as followers.  These are my girls (all 900 +) who I have developed relationships with, some of which are actually closer than my in real life friends, make sense? I love social media for this reason (sorry babe), and that is why I am completely obsessed with Instagram, not to mention, I follow so many beautiful souls who have a heart for God.  A simple post on there from them can be SO uplifting in times of need.

      There are SO many more people I can personally reach on Instagram. With that being  said, I also wanted to put this blog on my Instagram, which is no big deal.  I made the post, and prepared to put the link on my bio, so that my followers could easily click, and BOOM, right here they would be.  The devil had different plans in mind.  Its been going on 4 hours since I posted the blog link on Facebook, and for the past 4 hours I have fervently tried to add my URL to my bio section on Insta. I've tried the computer, I've tried my Kindle, I've tried the Instagram app on my phone (I've even deleted and re-downloaded it!) and still, error message.  Did  I tell you I filed a ticket with Instagram? Does anybody see where this is going? Does anybody see where the devil (unfortunately) does have control over some aspects of your life?  You have to to tell him to get behind you.  

      I could have said to myself, "Self, this is God's way of saying maybe blogging isn't the outlet he chose for you to bring this to life.", I could have stopped myself at that point and said that this wasn't it. I have prayed and prayed about this blog, and I am totally not someone who wants to THROW my life on the World Wide Web, but I TOTALLY am someone who wants to live in His mighty will, so I pressed on, and I'm laughing.  I'm not taking this as sign that this isn't the way that The Lord wanted me to bring His Word,  but I am SO on fire right now for the Lord and I'm already claiming all the GOODNESS this blog is going to bring, I pray it blesses every single individual that reads it, but if not it is blessing me! You have to claim your victory, even if that victory is something as simple as  getting your blog URL on your Instagram profile. 

Why somebody ordinary like me?

There isn't anything particularly different about me than there is you.   I'm 23, almost 24, have a full time job that happens to be my dream job, a sweet baby boy and a very loving boyfriend. Can I tell you its about Divine Favor?  There is most definitely nothing special about me.   I have no hidden talents, can't carry a tune in a bucket, play very little piano, and my biggest hobby is sleep.

      Around 6 months ago when The Lord laid it on my heart to start showing my friends, my family, my community, the world, a glimpse into my faith, I was dumbfounded.   Being taught my entire life never to question God, there I sit; second pew back, right hand side of the church, dead center in the amen corner, I said it.  I said, "God, why somebody ordinary like me?"  He could have chosen anyone, but why me to bare my soul to the world? And how?  With a work schedule like I have, I barely have time to be at home, let alone be somewhere else, sharing lessons and teaching people something that I really haven't completely figured out myself.

      Then there was the acceptance.  "Okay, Lord," I prayed; if that is your will, I will fulfill it. But you are going to have to show me how." Where am I supposed to broadcast this? Who should be my audience? What should I talk about? So I prayed, and I prayed, and I prayed.  And here we are.

      I'm now in the middle of a beautiful Bible Study by Beth Moore, called JESUS, THE ONE AND ONLY.  It has completely opened my eyes to the idea of sharing my studies, and adventures of faith with friends, and family here on this blog.  During the first few chapters it taught me a lot about Mary.  I didn't know all that much about Mary, but I knew that she was Jesus' mother.  Did you know she was maybe 13-14 at the time she told God that she would carry his ONE and ONLY Son?  Suddenly, my problem and question of "Why somebody ordinary like me?" became a lot smaller.  Mary was just an ordinary girl, and she was selected to bring Our Savior into this world.  So surely, I can obey the word of God and share a little of my insight with you.

      As far as looks go, this blog has TONS of work that needs to be done.  But, first and foremost, I wanted to obey His Word and get it started. I hope everyone who decides to read gets exactly what He wants you to; after all, I'm just a messenger.